Sunday, July 31, 2011

Useless

I've never felt so stressed out before. So many things to do, so dumb my brain. I dunno what to do dunno what will happen dunno this dunno that i feel like a piece of stupid shit.
I'm so reliant on others i really dunno what to do now. I think i'm a burden to all my friends. Everything also must depend on them and follow them. Because i dun have a brain. I'm 100% dependent on my friends. Now that i'm alone in this stupid situation i have no one to rely on now. And i can't rely on myself because im too idiotic.
And i have to keep troubling and pestering my friends about what to do now with my stupid problem. I feel so useless, even till now i have to rely on the help from my friends to solve my own problem. I suck leh really, i'm useless like a useless piece of shit.

Go everywhere also dunno how to go need to follow friends, do everything also dunno how to do need to get help from friends, everything also need my friends to remind me, tell me, help me, do with me.
Without my friends i might as well just go and die. I'm such a useless piece of shit seriously.

I really wanna Thank Esther, Jolene, Soe, Maria, Duck, Brenda, Peiqi for helping me through and through over everything even though you guys know you dun really have to help me but you all still keep helping me! THANK YOU!!! I know i'm super mafan and irritating, thank you for bearing with me and giving me all the help you can, i really dunno what to do now but to thank you guys so much!

And thank you boyf, for always being there for me and constantly reminding me that i'm not useless. Thank you for wiping my tears away and telling me things are going to be okay!

I know i need to be independent, but i just can't. I dunno why but i just can't seem to.

Friday, July 29, 2011

When poultrys enter NUS:D

All hell breaks lose.
CORS bidding is the epitome is stressful lol! Its totally like investment, you have to constantly monitor the increase and decrease and decide carefully whether you wanna up or down your bid. Poutrys sat down at MAC from 2 to 5pm with our eyes glued to the CORS website the whole time and all we can talk about is BIDS haha! And when the clock strikes 5pm we heaved signs of relief because bidding is now over. Oh gosh i really really hope we all managed to get the modules we want!!! Good luck to all of us!!!
Anyway, here are our retarded faces caused by the intense stress of CORS haha!


Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Free hair, body and face treatment with peiqi!

Goodbyes.

They are horrible. Sad, bitter and heartwrenching!
Especially when you know its goodbye and we may never meet again:(

I said my goodbyes to the two pretty little primary 3 twins that i was teaching ytd, and oh god its so painful:( Yes, they were naughty and naughty and really naughty but that's what makes them so cute and lovable! But no la, they're not really naughty:) They're just playful actually haha! I think i have a fetish for playful kids lol! They are the ones who gave me THIS!:D

And now it's time to go and never see them again:( Because my uni's starting nect week and i have to drop one of my tutees and i chose to drop them because they lived the furthest to me:( I feel so guilty leh! They are so cute so nice so pretty and YET. I. DROPPED. THEM. T.T

The last words they said to me was :"Jie jie come and swim with us soon okay!"
And i said OK, but i'm never gonna do that cause its just impossible.

People come and people go. You meet people and warm up to them and then you have to leave and never see each other again. So cruel but its always like that T.T

Your classmates, your schoolmates, your work mates, your neighbours... Once you leave you know you're not only leaving behind the school or company, you're also leaving behind your friends and all the people you had known.
And unless you're really close with them, you know you'll never be able to see them again.
And even if you're really close with them, they may be too busy to meetup:/

But then again, who knows? Singapore is so small, i bump into people i knew from the past every now and then! (And we say Hi and then the awkwardness sets in so we say Bye lol!)
Heehee maybe i can be a teacher after my uni and teach the two twins again at their school as their teacher??:D

Here's them! RENEE and RACHEL:D
Goodbye. Maybe we'll see each other again.:)

Sunday, July 17, 2011

Heartwarmed:)

Almost full attendance today! Only short of WEIQI and KISNAA!
Meetups like this are always nice, steamboat and chit-chatting in front of the TV just like one big family! Isaac's family are so nice lo! They always let us animals into their hse and dun mind us making a din, and a mess out of their living room! Plus, Isaac's mom ALWAYS supply food, and drinks, which is ALWAYS COKE lol! Really so so so super nice of them! So generous, so big-hearted, so warm! THANKS ISAAC!:D
We didn't played games like last time this week though:/ Partly because the lazy worm got into all of our bodies but mainly because Toys Story 1, 2 AND 3 are showing on Isaac's cable TV! So childish lo my usual clique, esp that Duck, Jay and Sal! See Toys only must watch haha! But nvm la i dun blame them, i think they're deprived during their childhood, esp duck i know lol!

Duck: "Eh this picture look like the ;溏心風暴之家好月圓 poster!" (Now showing on ch U at 10pm that one!)
Me: Yalor GOT LEH!! Then Brenda and Esther are the bad guys! (cause you see their -.- faces in the pic so Kaopeh haha!)
No more bad guys! We are one big happy family. Last episode, the end!:D
Cakes from Brenda (she always buys us cakes whenever she comes haha!) and steamboat by Isaac!
Heart these girls so much!

Uni's starting in August and all of us are going different routes. We wun ever be in the same class, sitting together in three rows listening to lectures and tutorials anymore, nor will we be able to occupy three tables in the canteen and eat together during breaks anymore, But even so, i still wanna see you guys every week for the rest of my life! This is so sad, but i know university is never gonna be the same again without you guys:(

It's been almost a year now. It's waves and waves of nostalgia everytime i walk past JJC.
The soccer field, the running track, the security guard, the school canteen... so much memories so dear to me.
It's just like Commonwealth Secondary all over again, only this time, its stronger. It had been so hard to move on from Commonwealth and now it is even harder to move on from JJ. In the future i'll have to move on from NUS and move on from every stage in life.

Oh god i have a great inertia.
I think i was more sociable 8 months ago.

Thursday, July 14, 2011

The boyf : "I don't feel like doing anything. I stare at the ceiling but it feels good eh"

WTF?!! HAHAHAHAHA!

Anyway here's one funny video from Ryan higa, "Nice guys finish last" haha!

Saturday, July 9, 2011

Away from home

For a day.
Went to JohorBahru with my boyf and his family on Friday and bought lots of cheap stuffs weewee!:D I love cheap deals haha! Makes me feel like i've "zhuan dao" haha! JB is seriously filled with delicious cheap food that you cannot resist haha! After every one hour of shopping we have to stop and EAT lol! My boyf's brother said :'' you can go home tell your parents you go Taiwan liao, shop eat shop eat shop eat whole day only haha!"

It's like a dream in JB leh! Actually it's like a dream everytime i go overseas lol! It's like i'm not really living in the real world. Because my real world occurs only in Singapore lol!
I think i've been living in Singapore for far too much lol! My whole life, i've been in Singapore and i love it here!
The trees along the roads, the flowers under the blocks, the greenery, the dustbins everywhere, the lines of straight roads, the organised HDB flats, the playgrounds and schools...
Singapore is SO pretty! And clean and fresh! It's a great feeling everytime i reach back in Singapore and see HDBs nearby haha! I'm a true blue Singaporean haha!

I think my boyf's family is really damn nice too lol! They sponsored my whole trip cause i didn't change money:/ , bought nice food for me every one hour, waited for me during my countless times of going toilet and at the immigration checkpoint too (the queue for singapore citizen at the checkpoint takes longer than the Malaysian one tskk)!  I feel both apologetic and grateful to his family but i dunno how to express it so i didn't tell them:(
But nvm i hope the boyf will help me tell haha!
Anyway, here's the only picture from JB haha! Neoprints i took with his sister!:D
I've been a total nerd living in the Jurong West St 42 area my whole 19 years of life.
Then you came in and show me the world.:) Thanks!

Thursday, July 7, 2011

Waiting for winter

It's a lovely Thursday morning and i'm waiting, for my boyf to wake up.
Lollol sometimes i wonder how do ppl stay awake in the night and sleep in the morning. It's so vampirish, and UNHEALTHY! Are you a vampire huh boyf?? If you're not then quit sleeping in the morning tskkk!!

I'm thinking bout school, thinking bout life, thinking bout money, thinking bout death. All thanks to Norwegian woods, it's such a sad book leh aiyo! The author seems to be such a sad person:( It's so sad i dun feel good reading it but it's so captivating i can't stop reading lol! #The power of words.
When i was in Primary school, 10 years later i'll still be studying, i'll still be leading the life of a student under the care and concern of my parents and my teachers. And our biggest fear is examinations. 10 years is nothing much.
Now that it's 10 years later and i'm turning 19, 10 years later would be seriously so many years later! I foresee that i've finished university, i'd be married, i'd have kids, i'd be working, i'd be supporting my family.
Just 10 years and i'd be grown from being a kid to nurturing my own kids. Then it'd be like looking at myself growing up when i look at my kids, i'm gonna love my kids so much haha!
I'll buy lots of cane and whip my kids if they dun study. HIAK HIAK!

And then there's death. Everybody will die, but i really wouldn't know what to do when the time comes. There'd be the funeral, and the slowly getting used to life suddenly without someone who had been so close to you. Oh myyyyyy................

Nvm nvm that'll be many many years later, we should focus on the present now instead of dwelling into the past or worrying about the future! School's starting in August! Excitedd!!! No more wasting time already, i'll need to snap back to study mode once again for the last time. T.T it'll be examinations again omg!
New friends new school new lecturers new curriculum new clothes new bags new shoes! And with school 5 days a week, plus CCA, plus teaching tuitions i'm really so afraid that we all wouldn't have time for meetups anymore sobs sobs. Let's just hope Uni won't take away too much of our time and we'll still have time for each other!
For school, for revision, for exams, for family, for boyfriend, for friends, for tuitions, for exercise, for shopping, for KPOP, for omg so many things!!

Dun fret dun fret i shall go watch my Hyuna's Bubble Pop Mv now while waiting for my pig to wake up lollol!
SEXY leh HyunA haha!!!

Monday, July 4, 2011

Where boys become men.

POP loh!:D This time it's Gilbert's and Kisnaa's! After Isaac and Sal, its now their turn to evolve into man:)
Which means dear Jay is still a boy, cause he never POP haha!;D

A01's Usual clique got up at 530 in the morning to witness their graduation. I still think we're so sweet, all of us made an effort to get up early in the morning even before the sun to be there with our two army boys haha! We all made an effort to NOT be late, esp ME! Hahahah because duck sent me 4 smses to warn me not to be late i very scared lol! So in the end, i'm the EARLIEST!!:D And the late ones are Isaac and Jay, with the latter being expected to be late haha! But we still made it:D And its all worthwhile:)

The men in green stinked, were sunburnt and insanely tired, but they still held on, standing upright and singing the NS song with pride. I'm so proud of them, we're all so proud of them!
I bet all the girlfriends there totally fell in love with their boyfriends once again even though they were all sweat and odour haha!

Dear boyf, i can't wait for your POP and to SMELL YOU hahaha!;D

So pretty ryt Marina bay floating platform in the day!
The sun is bright and the sky is clear. Singapore's skyline is breathtaking.:)
All of us! With Kisnaa doing the BMT ROAR haha!;D
One more! With Kisnaa this time being normal lol!:D
The nicest picture of the day!
The moment the boys are waiting for. The moment we all came here for. The moment the boys truly became men.
Then we went on for Popeyes and Saboteur (again!) haha! And we all cheated. LOL.
The usual clique always cheats, be it UNO, Daidi, Monpoly deal or Sabo, everyone of us cheats, BLATENTLY somemore lol! I think we should be named the cheating clique instead, haha!

I think maybe, perhaps, all of us secretly feel bad (the apologetic bad) when we win and feel bad (the sore-loser bad) too when we lose. So we cheat, and show everybody that we cheat. SO NO HARD FEELINGS, NO MATTER WHAT!:D So sweet hor us haha!
We live in harmony, wins and loses doesn't divide us.
Okay bye! POP is kool!:D

Friday, July 1, 2011

The power of makeup.

Just wanted to show you this!
http://michellelin.blogspot.com/2011/06/power-of-makeup-part-2.html
Because i felt so happy after reading it LOL! There are not as many pretty girls as i had thought after all, whewwwwwwwwww i heaved a sigh of relief HAHAHA!:D

Stay home thursday:)

It rained, rained, and rained all through morning and into the afternoon.
It ALWAYS rains on the day we're going to Vera's condo for a swim. The rain never fails. And we always fail, to swim. Haha!
We've only swam at Vera's condo TWICE up to date although we've been to her house for the umpteenth times lol! But that's okay because her house already have everything we need to keep ourselves entertained haha!
Food, Wii, Movies, Kungfupanda, and even a Dog.  You name it, she's got it:D
And so, it's stay home thursday afternoon with the A01 girls!:D
Just realized everybody in the above picture likes to bake, except me. Hahaha! I think i'm not entirely a girl:/
Why don't i like to bake too?!?!:(  I think maybe i'm just lazy?? Or too busy?
Hmmmmmmmmmmm No, i really dun like to bake, nor cook, haha!
Bye!

Being friendly.

Norwegian Woods, that's the book that i've been reading these days on the bus, on the train, when i'm waiting for the train, and when i'm bored. It's been made into a movie and my boyf borrowed the book for me to read because i said i wanted to watch the movie. I think he doesn't wanna watch it so he borrowed the book instead for me LOL! And, more surprisingly, HE WANTS TO READ IT TOO!!! After i'm done with it, i'm so flabbergasted lol, because the boyf i know DOESN'T READ. HAHA!

Norwegian Woods takes me back in time to the 1960s in a place in Japan, it's a story about an anti-social boy and girl mainly haha! It's a wonderful book about love and life and it contains so much depth! Everytime i read it, it takes my soul away. It is so interesting, the japanese way of life and they way they love, although it doesn't sound interesting the way i put it haha! But they're really kool! They lead their lives so differently lol! My life seems childish as compared to theirs haha!

I've only finished the first quarter of the book and it talks about this guy, Toru's life. And he is SO ANTI-SOCIAL. Lol he only has two friends, Kizuki, his best friend, and Naoko, his best friend's girlfriend. Hmmmmm i wonder are there really ppl like him in real life? Really got ppl have ONLY TWO friends?! These two friends are a couple somemore, hmmmmm. (But the story goes on to tell that Kizuki died and Toru was forced to alter his way of life, including making new friends...)

Anyway, the main point is, Toru didn't like friendly ppl, he dislike girls who talk alot and try to be friends with him. He felt that friendly ppl are irritating and abit fake. THIS, ANGERED ME.

Because that means he doesn't like me. I dun like ppl who dun like me. LOL!

But really ma, we make an effort to be friendly and make friends, so that we can be comfortable with each other and help each other, but instead of reciprocating and being nice you think i'm irritating?!?!

When we're friendly we're not trying to act all fake so that you can like us and be friends with us, we're really just trying to be friendly! We're making an effort to be nice!!

I know sometimes maybe i get too carried away and come across as fake, but really, i'm just trying to make friends!:/

K la but i still love the book la lol, I understand that Toru is just a fictional character who needs to be like that so that the story turns out deep and thought-provoking. And indeed, Norwegian Woods just thought-provoked me haha!

Maybe i should just be a little less friendly when i enter NUS in August, i'll only be friendly to those who are friendly to me FIRST. YEA, I SHALL DO THAT. haha!

K BYE! Shall leave you with my face now hahahhaa!:D

Tongue delights!

Old town with sevenups and Delifrance with poultrys, i've been spending alot on FOOD these days haha!:D
The interior of Delifrance looks real cosy!! Next time i'll try to decorate my home like that lol!:D
Went window shopping with 4ups! And it's really WINDOW shopping haha!
Only Jolene bought LOTS of things, as usual la haha! Jolene's a major shopaholic!:D
These two groups of girls, I LOVE!!!;D

My dream come true:)

You're my dream boy, my prince charming, my wish came true:)
This 6 months with you is so amazing. The sun shines everyday and butterflies fly around me. I've never felt like this before, it's like i'm back to that small girl being in love everytime i'm with you!

It is with you that i felt the happiest:D Not that i'm not happy elsewhere but it's only with you that i can smile non stop from beginning to end. From the minute i see you each time, my lips were smiling and smiling till the moment we bid our farewell, and it's only then that i would remember to rest my cheek muscles haha!
I can truly be who i am, no secrets, no hiding, no acting, no trying-to-be-nice. Because i know that despite all my flaws you still see me as perfect, and it's the nicest feeling ever! Knowing that i'm loved gave me so much security and comfort!

Never a moment is boring with you. You're that witty, that funny, that cute!:D "Humorous guys are immediately attractive", you're amazing!:D

You make me feel like i own the whole world.:D

Thanks for Pluto boyf! It's my first mega sized soft toy I'VE FINALLY GOT A MEGA SIZED SOFT TOY WEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!;D OMG ILY LA HAHAHAHA!

(PS: Pluto is the name of the yellow dog!:D It's Mickey mouse's dog as told by the boyf haha! So cute ryt the name! I didn't even know got this kind of dog until today lol! But from today onwards my favourite cartoon, dog, soft toy would be PLUTO HAHAHA!:D)
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